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pof I tended to get messaged by older men who live just outside london and are quite blokey traditional.I didn't find much humour on the guardian lot but I didn't really commit to it.Would you walk into a pub/club or bar and expect to meet the Miss Right waiting at the bar?

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Also they pick your matches for you, and there's something weird about the photos, can't remember what exactly but I think you can't see people's photos unless you're a mutual match or something (I never joined but have heard several people say this in the past)Sites like GSM are good if you're a) in a big city, or near to one and c) are a middle class guardian reader. I have heard good reports about Lovestruck, but I believe it's only in London.

And again I suspect a little bit middle class and earnest.

It's something of a fallacy that only 'decent' people will be on paid sites.

There are plenty of weirdos (of both sexes) on both the free and the paid sites. All the men I have encountered via POF (with possibly 1 exception) have been vanishers, timewasters, married - but pretending to be single, perverts, sex-obsessed nutters, unattractive, unintelligent, misogynistic, racist, sexist, homophobic.... OKC is a haven for the polyamorous, fetishists etc. MSF is terrible, very low traffic and most people aren't subscribed. Run by Christians and won't let anyone spearated but not divorced be a member . I am actually meeting one guy for coffee in an hour and another one tomorrow afternoon.

Looks like OKCupid, Guardian Soulmates might be worth a look..POF some positive and negative experiences..

Will recommend these and fingers crossed he has more luck!

Hes now been sating someone he met through friends for 6 months or so.

I remember there was a very good thread last year where someone like you was setting up dates with single mumsnetters - I haven't followed it but it looked very promissingoh, and there was another one where mumsnetter was looking for a date for her ex HI would love to have found out if either was successful It all depends.

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